These Invisible Hands: Serial 1

                        1

On the Eastern coast of Scotland

At the banks of the Firth of Forth

What the natives called Auld Reekie

Was the Athens of the North

Where thinkers, learned and lettered

Mixed with tinkers of the mercantile

Up the crag and down the tail

Along the Royal Mile

                        2

There among the schools of scholars

Were the surgeons of high degree,

And they performed dissections

As they taught anatomy

With a steady stream of cadavers

On these reputations were made

Until the day the well ran dry

Of bodies for the blade

                        3

But the shortage bred a business

For the new resurrection men

Who dug for gold in graveyards

At night like fox to hen

They took their losses in summer

When a body might quickly decay

But they earned it back in winter time

When cold kept the worms away

                        4

And of all the undertakers

Who longed to belong at the fair

The most gifted were two Williams

By the names of Burke and Hare

For they were not common grave-robbers

Just two Irishmen, drifters and friends

Who saw a chance to stake a claim

And reap sweet dividends

CHORUS:

And it was all in the name of science

It was all for the fame or the gold

In the freest of free markets

Where even a corpse could be sold

So, let's raise a glass to the prophet [profit]

Whose Reason is rhyme for the greed

By the law of demand

These Invisible Hands

Will supply anything you might need

                        5

William Hare and his wife Maggie

Owned a house full of rented rooms

It was there they made a killing

As none would e'er presume

For when a miller named Joseph

Up and died owing months of back rent

Burke and Hare recouped the loss

His corpse in recompense

                        6

Yes, they pried the lid from his coffin

And with stuffing they filled the box

Off to Surgeon's Square with the carcass

For the grateful Doctor Knox

The good doctor paid them top dollar

As anxious he was for the flesh

As he marveled at the quality

Of a specimen so fresh

                        7

From the first of their fine earnings

Was the plan of the business set

To usurp Grim Reaper's calling

For their own macabre duet

The scheme was wickedly simple

As plenty of work came their way

With good Scotch whiskey laid in store

To soften up the prey

                        8

When at last the drunk were sleeping

Brawny Burke sat upon the chest

While Hare with pad or pillow

Swiftly finished off the rest

With practice in the new method

And money exchanged more than once

The pair killed sixteen lodgers there

At one or two each month

CHORUS